Monday, July 25, 2005

Create Your Own E-mail Spam

A template for people in a hurry Cut and paste your selections from the choices below. (Note: do NOT proofread! This merely detracts from the authenticity and sincerity of your plea.) 1. Choose a Subject Header a) FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION b) EMPLOYING YOUR SERVICES c) Consider this proposal (Use lower case if your readership has an IQ over 80) d) SOLICITING FOR ASSISTANCE e) FUNDS TRANSFER #SL81-58380-B 2. Choose a Salutation: a) Kind Sir/Madam b) ATTN: c) Trusted Friend, d) I hope you are an honest person (and have not responded to any of these scams yet! Heheh) e) Dear sucker 3. Introduce yourself: I am a a) Minister of Finance b) Chief of Monetary Governance c) former special Adviser to the ousted Head of State d) Senior Vice President of Accounting d) Some other foreign-sounding finance title 4. Explain your title: Representing the a) National Bank of Nigeria b) Chen-Tech Taiwan Industries Corporation(CTTI) c) Diamond-rich district of Sierra Leone d) MINISTRY OF MINERAL RESOURCES AND ENERGY OF SOUTH AFRICA e) Any fictitious organization from an exotic nation where large sums of undetectable money become constantly available. 5. Innoculate against the reader's incredulity: You are doubtless surprised to be getting such a request from a stranger in a foreign country, but a a) curious b) unusual c) desperate d) opportune e) critical 6: Appeal to greed: situation has arisen that requires the assistance from someone such as yourself. At this moment, a sum of a) $200,000,000 (two hundred million) (NOTE: You must always spell out how much the sum is after the numerical figure. Your respondants won't understand that many zeroes. b) ¥18,500,000,000 (eighteen billion, five hundred million Yen, equivalent to US$2,309,000) (NOTE: The monetary conversion need not be correct.) c) £2,100,000 (Nigerian pounds, roughly equivalent to three point seven million US dollars) d) Some other large sum. Try to use the form of currency used in the alleged country of origin. 7. Innoculate further against the reader's incredulity: is awaiting disbursement, pending the receipt of a) Identity of an undeceased relative. b) Authorization signature from someone who happens to have your name. c) Security clearance known only to me, and very soon you as well. d) Acceptance from a trusted foreign partner. e) Some other preposterous fabrication. 8. Move in for the kill: Should you choose to assist, your gracious help will be rewarded by an equal share of half this amount, deposited to any bank account you wish. If you are interested in this transaction, kindly reply this massege with all your phone, fax numbers, or email me through Ngabo@Hotnudeteens.com to enable us to furnish you with details and procedures of this transaction. 9. Give them your name: Warmest Repect, Ngabo Tblisi 9. Tell them that this is not a scam: NOTE: I know there may be scams and junk mails flying here and there on the internet but certainly, this is not one. Please do not fail to understand that in spite of all that, opportunities of this kind still abound. If you have ever wished or prayed for something good to come your way, now I urge you to take this message seriously and with an open mind. You could never know. This may be an answer to your prayers. So please give it a benefit of doubt, and with good faith and trust join me and I am assuring you now that you will never be disappointed. E-mail them to everyone on the face of the planet, and watch the money roll in!


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